Wednesday, July 05, 2006
..Disappointed..argh.

Orange so tired today. Quite depressed now in fact. why did i make that mistake just now? argh... really feel so shitified now. I meant to be careful but end up it backfired.. end up i was careless... argh.

today also discovered other mistakes.. tried hard not to be blur about things.. end up still made a blunt.. argh. God.. i need a break. The pressure is coming in so fast now.. cannot afford to make another miss. God.. replenish my weak brain cells... replace with strong memory cells. Help me to feel confident about my delivery in everything I do..

today learnt many things.. cos made alot mistakes... guess its not a bad thing after all. also received info that my COC assessment is on 26 July! think that day got other things to do.. but i think COC still comes first. so hmmm.. maybe no need to do other things on that day.

argh... today realised my last day of work is nOT on 27 Jul bUT on 28 jUl... worst thing was.. I'm on night duty on 28!! ie to say i can only be secured from work on sat morning! argh.. how can i make such a blur mistake?! argh.. but good thing is IF pass clear my COC assessment on 26 Jul, I will be certified to do night duty on 28.. but IF never clear.. means had really waste my this 2.5 months of work, studying day and night for this COC.. and my 28 Jul will be just doing understudy once again.. just like my any other days in work... argh.

tmr.. orange staying onboard.. y? cos cleared my ippt already and they need a supervising officer. ippt is early early morning on fri... hmmm.. sigh.. since haven't clear my COC.. just stay in to study then fri morning no need wakey so early. hope my decision is wise..

today's big mistake will be Orange's reminder for things of tomorrow. hope i can be a productive learner and leader. God.. take charge.